Relationship Skill Training- Change Within and Between
Before you dedicate your life
to a person, a marriage, a family;
to a corporation, a political party,
a peace campaign;
to a religion, a revolution, or a
make one other dedication first.
First dedicate yourself to LOVE.
Decide to let Love be your
intention, your purpose and
your point of View.
And then let Love inspire you,
support you, and guide you
in every other dedication
you make thereafter.
Robert Holden, Ph.D.
ARE YOU HUNGRY FOR MORE MEANING IN YOUR RELATIONSHIPS
WE TEACH CONCRETE SKILLS YOU CAN USE RIGHT AWAY TO:
SPEAK SO THAT OTHERS WILL LISTEN
LISTEN SO OTHERS WILL TALK
RESOLVE CONFLICT AND INCREASE INTIMACY
Newport Beach BEST FAMILY COUNSELOR Award Program Honors Dr. Timothy Ryan for His Achievements
NEWPORT BEACH October 5, 2013 — Timothy Ryan Ph.D. D.Division. has been selected for the 2013 Best of Newport Beach Award in the Family Counseling category by the Newport Beach Award Program.
Various sources of information were gathered and analyzed to choose the winners in each category. The 2013 Newport Beach Award Program focuses on quality, not quantity. Winners are determined based on the information gathered both internally by the Newport Beach Award Program and data provided by third parties.
About Newport Beach Award Program
The Newport Beach Award Program is an annual awards program honoring the achievements and accomplishments of local businesses throughout the Newport Beach area. Recognition is given to those companies that have shown the ability to use their best practices and implemented programs to generate competitive advantages and long-term value.
The Newport Beach Award Program was established to recognize the best of local businesses in our community. Our organization works exclusively with local business owners, trade groups, professional associations and other business advertising and marketing groups. Our mission is to recognize the small business community’s contributions to the U.S. economy.
SOURCE: Newport Beach Award Program
Newport Beach Award Program
RETURNING TO LOVE INTIMACY TRAINING PROGRAM
Few of us learned the lessons of having a secure bond growing up. When we beome wounded in childhood, we block our hearts, shut down our ability to give or receive love and disconnect to protect ourselves in various ways.
Our program teaches you how to not only have a secure bond but also how to release blocks to giving and receiving love. We teach you to become aware of and consciously have greater choice in what and how you want to communicate. Our deepest need is to have a reliable, secure bond where we know we matter and can have our needs cared matter.
In our “Returning to Love Program” for Couples and Singles, Parents and Children, we teach you how to listen is ways to truly understand core needs and speak in ways to get your core needs met. Often we learn survival adaptation skills blowing up shutting down and they become our default habits under stress. We teach you how to reduce stress and become conscious and intentional instead of acting out in reactive defensive Judgmental listening in an effort to win arguments.
We teach you how to change your meta-communication (the way you communicate) to reinforce what really matters ie a strong caring secure bond. We teach you how to connect with Presence (non reactive listening) vs. Reactive defensive listening.
In as few as six sessions, you will learn Advance listening skills of Compassionate Listening to heal, integrate conflicting views and return to a deeper more meaningful connection to yourself and others. We teach Compassionate Listening which is based on Non violent Communication (NVC) principles and practices. We also teach Love Language skills based on Gary Chapman to help couples connect to heart language (feelings and Needs) and use principles from John Gottman 30 year study of Masters and Disasters in Relationships.
We also teach relationship success principles based on Imago Training with Shadow Work to help individuals and couples understand soul contracts and see their relationships as an opportunity to reclaim disowned and disconnected parts of themselves. In summary,
Our Returning to Love Program is a consolidation of h the best of cutting edge research and Theory and Practical tools you can use right away to enrich all your relationships.
WE TEACH YOU HOW TO USE CONFLICT AS A MEANS TO INCREASING YOUR INTIMACY
Yes, conflict can actually bring you closer together if you know how to listen empathically and authentically connect and express your own humanity. We also teach Imago Principles of Shadow Work which sees relationships as a path to returning us to wholeness. We teach you stretching caring behaviors by helping you understand and reclaim your disowned and disconnected parts that show up in your partner.
We teach you to make requests that will heal unmet needs using Imago practices to heal childhood wounds. Our program is also based on the work of John Gottman using 40 years of relationships research to understand what practices lead to couples being Masters vs. Disasters in their relationships.
MOST RELATIONSHIP DIFFICULTIES ARE
THE RESULT OF SELF SABOTAGING HABITS
AND POOR COMMUNICATION SKILLS
Its unfortunate that for centuries we were expected to simply know how to be in relationship. It was a luck of the draw that you found the right person and things worked out.
Over time, our culture has taught us to think and speak in ways that can actually wall individuals off from one another and perpetuate conflict, internal pain and even violence. John Gottman says that couples who perpetuate a negative communication pattern ie condemnation, criticism, attack are most prone to be the disasters.
IN SIX TO TWELVE WEEKS YOU CAN BE ON YOUR WAY
TO A NEW YOU AND A NEW RELATIONSHIP PATTERN
Returning to Love Skill Training
Returning to Love Intimacy Training is a blend of the latest most powerful transformation of consciousness and language patterns to help individuals and couples, parents and children become more authentic and empathic and have more meaningful quality relationships. All our advanced communication techniques allow you to transform conflict into understanding and collaboration.
We teach you concrete skills that allow everyone’s needs to matter. Compassionate Listening using the principles of NVC, Imago Shadow work and many state of the art proven therapies teach you a step by step method in practical skills to deal with issues in the present and resolve issues from the past.
Our Returning to Love Program Integrates
Principles and Practices from:
Attachment Theory by John Bowlby
Emotionally Focus Therapy by Sue Johnson
Compassionate Listening using the principles of NVC
Imago Relationship Therapy /Training Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.
Shadow Work and Understanding Soul Contracts
John Gottman’s Relationship Research on Masters vs. Disasters
“Love Language” Gary Chapman
Eckhart Tolle “The Presence Process”
“Men Are From Mars and Women are From Venus” John Gray
Timothy Ryan “The Amends Process”
And much more!
The Corner Stone of Returning to Love, Compassionate Listening is teaching those willing to learn a new form of communication, a communication that is non reactive and translates criticism into understanding of underlying feelings and needs. We teach you powerful advanced communication techniques how to develop greater presence become non-reactive and listen with greater empathy to transform conflict into understanding and correcting misunderstandings from past wounds..
Compassionate Presence provides a context for connecting to what’s alive in our selves and others in an authentic and safe “In To Me See” intimacy. We teach you how to get past the default filters or story lines to really understand and know what steps to take to keep both you and your partner on track.
Rather than giving into reactive habitual (power over) behavior ie. judging, blaming or attacking defending with “no win” repeated arguments. We teach you how to be safe, in protected zones creating a practice that advocates equality (power with) focusing on every one’s needs mattering and learning how to connect on an empathetic level. or “win win.” We support what’s alive in us and the other by becoming present to feelings and needs and requests of ourselves and others at any given moment.
One of my client’s wife once came into her husband’s office and stated “are you going to be on that computer all night long!!?The husband was able to pause instead of reacting set aside his judgments and connect with empathy to himself and his wife.He wanted closure to finish up a project he guessed his wife wanted connection.He responded “Do you need some connection?
Her voice soften and she responded “yes.” He said give me 20 minutes to finish this project and we can be together and do anything you like.She was happy and said “okay,”
We Can Choose How We Think
We Can Choose How We Act
We Can Choose How We Talk
We Can Choose How We Listen
Compassionate self/other connection shows you situations and relationships can be transformed through the power of connecting to feelings and needs. If the husband had reacted and yelled back or stormed out with unresolved frustration and the wife was left alone with her unresolved frustration, the evening would have been ruined.
Compassionate listening is both a spiritual practice as well as a communication technique. We teach Eckhart Tolle’s the Presences Process and show you ways to reduce your fight flight freeze tendency. Compassionate Presence allows us see our common humanity, and listen and speak with a quality of attention that let’s everyone feel accepted and safe which allows everyone to live more peacefully. These skills apply to thought, language, and using our power in a way that honors everyone’s needs.
Compassion Listening using principles of NVC s a easy to learn process for creating emotional freedom, self-acceptance, inner peace, and fulfilling relationships. It involves expressing ourselves honestly, listening with empathy, and developing a more compassionate inner relationship.
People around the world are learning Compassionate Dialogue using NVC skills to transform conflict, create harmony in their relationships, and build a world where everyone’s needs are honored through compassionate giving, and without the use of coercion or violence.
Returning to Love teaches you a step by step
method in practical skills with a powerful consciousness
and vocabulary to help you better connect to yourself
and others in ways that insure understanding and collaboration
where everyone gets to have their needs met peacefully.
Based on NVC, Compassionate Dialogue Training helps people to speak in a way that inspires compassion and understanding as well as initiate difficult conversations with more ease and confidence while remaining centered and peaceful. Compassionate Dialogue also allows you to be centered while hearing difficult messages and allow both of you to express anger fully, safely and respectfully . It allows you to learns ways to powerfully shift patterns of thinking that lead to depression, guilt, shame enliven yourself by expressing and receiving gratitude translate criticism, judgments and blame into life-serving messages resolve long-standing conflicts and heal painful relationships inspire others to change their behavior willingly
Nonviolent Communication allows individuals to connect directly to what’s alive in themselves and in others. It is an energetic dynamic process that brings aliveness to relationships by supporting an authentic flow of compassionate communication.
Nonviolent Communication is a quality of consciousness that listens with the intent to connect with humanity and value every one’s needs. It also gives and receives with the spirit of pure natural giving. It focuses on understanding with empathy for the self and the other.
Returning To Love
Find The Perfect Way
to Connect to Yourself and Others
Jackals vs. Giraffes
The Four Horse Men
Turtles and Lightening Bolts
Advanced Communication Skills
The Presence Process
How to Self Care
The Soothing Process
The Three Rs of The Amends Process
Flooding (Tolerating Admiration)
Expressing Anger Safely
Behavior Change Request (BCR) and
BCR Review for Accountability
Language of Aliveness
Partnership and Visioning Toward
Creating The Relationship of Your Dreams
Not Your Nightmares
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Nonviolent communication was founded by Marshall Rosenberg, CLICK(nonviolentcommunication.com), who is paraphrased as stating:
Compassionate Communication involves both communication skills that foster safety, needs focus and needs mattering and understanding of feelings and needs in resolving conflict. Compassionate relating is a power with rather that a power over model to work together to meet the needs of all concerned. and consciousness of the interdependence of our well being and using power with others vs. power over others
This approach to communication emphasizes compassion and natural giving as the motivation for action rather than fear, guilt, shame, blame, coercion, threat or justification for punishment. In other words, it is about getting what you want for reasons you will not regret later. NVC is NOT about getting people to do what we want. It is about creating a quality of connection that gets everyone’s needs met through compassionate giving.
Compassionate Dialogue Basic Skills
1. Observations not evaluations,
2. Feelings not judgments,
3. Needs not strategies,
4. Requests not demands.
Dr. Ryan specializes in Resolving Conflict on all levels and creating the relationship of your dreams, not your nightmares. He is also an Ordained Minister and Faith Based Holistic, Pastoral Individual, Family, Relationship Counselor.
He has taken several advanced courses in Compassionate Leadership Training and is a life time registered member of Marriage Friendly Therapists. He is a Board Certified Fellow, Professional Counselor and Relationship Expert with the American Psychotherapy Association.
Donna Ryan has an M.A. in Education and is a Certified Professional EFT Practitioner and Matrix Healer. She has taken numerous courses in advanced listening training in NVC and Compassionate Listening.
Tim and Donna Ryan are co-leaders of AIWP Miracles Ministry, a 501 (c) (3) non-profit organization for healing and enriching relationships have been training in NVC and other relationship skill training modalities for the past 15 years.
We are committed to helping you remove any barriers to love and teaching you skills you can use right away for you best relationship and your best life ever!!!
WE ALSO PROVIDE HEALTH AND WELLNESS SERVICES:
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Blessings for Better Health, Wealth and Relationships
Tim and Donna Ryan
MILITARY, GOVERNMENT WORKERS, VETERANS AND UNION WORKERS